Rule 1: Unless you are the Pilot, First Officer, or other flight crew and are being paid to do it – Don’t fly.
Rule 2: If you absolutely have to travel, and don’t meet the qualifications noted in Rule 1, consider all alternatives first; like walking, driving, sailing, or sending someone else.
Rule 3: If you have complied with Rule 2, fail the qualifications of Rule 1, and still want to fly consider psychiatric counseling
Rule 4: If after Rule 2 and Rule 3 you still want to fly carry on your person everything you need to survive for a week
Rule 5: Take out extra life insurance at the counter. What’s that you say, they don’t offer flight life insurance anymore? That should tell you why Rule 1 is so important.
Rule 6: Always sit in the back, that way you will be the last one to crash, and you are near the toilets. On the down side, this can be a problem on long, or long-delayed flights so bring air freshener.
Rule 7: Bring earplugs and a clean pacifier or two
Rule 9: Lose as much weight as possible to fit in the new seats
Rule 10: Reconsider Rule 1.